Thoughts and contemplations

It’s not easy to understand the depth of God’s love for us. Because of our pride and fear, we fail to grasp how undeserving we are and how great His love is. At times I struggle with pride, so I tend to believe that I’ve earned any love I receive. Pride tells me that I am loved only when I am lovable, respectable and worthy. At other times I feel the tug of fear. While I am basking in acceptance, I live with the fear of being unmasked, revealing that I am much less than what others think me to be.
Faith is often mixed with doubt when life’s circumstances hurt so much. Why does God allow suffering if He loves us ?? Why does He let the evil reign ?? Why is there mourning and pain?? However, I was taught to look at things from different perspectives as I grow stronger in spiritual faith. Suffering and adversities become the means by which we are made hungry and thirsty for God.
God loves us too much to let us stay as we are. I used to think that He loves me when I do well ; but if I foul up, then I expect only His scorn. But I was wrong. God does not love us because we deserve it. He loves us despite what we are and what we did as He’s willing to sacrifice or our sins even if we are the most despicable human beings ever lived. This simple fact shatters our pride and dispels our fear. Never again shall I fear sufferings and tribulations, for through these, spiritual fibres of my life will be strengthened.
It is duty o all believers to sever connections with anything that hinders our spiritual progress and effectiveness. We must forsake all sin, all self-will and worldly pleasures that draw our hearts away from God, as the more clearly we see God’s sovereignty, the less perplexed we are by man’s calamities.